A light hearted chuckle for all of you. Many of you know I started in F&B, and it spanned much of my early career. The trends for F&B, and already difficult business, are brilliantly highlighted here, in these Portlandia sketches. The “organic” thing has sort of jumped the shark, and now the word has been so heavily borrowed, abused, and marketed, it doesn’t mean what it once meant. Of course, we’re concerned about chemicals in food production, but “organic” is more of a buzz word. The word local is the next thing to jump the shark, randomly appearing as a slogan for this year’s elections, or just a buzzword to overuse throughout a menu. It’s delicious, important, and vital – seriously, “local” is at it should be. As if we were so mindless to let the industrial revolution help us forget that a carrot grown out your back door is going to taste better than something shipped and trucked from half way across the world. Well, the industrial revolution did help us forget that, so was the rise of Truck Farming. People still shop at Trader Joe’s, with strawberry’s grown in South America, that get fungal within a day in your fridge. It’s not your fridge – trust me. It’s that you are eating the decaying flesh of ancient fruit. This really frames our panic about these trends, and it does it really well. The current trend is Gluten Free, which is hilariously inane, unless you have Celiac. Maybe not…. but I saw gluten free vodka the other day. Shark jumpage.

As for the “Mixologist” thing…. being a barkeep is an ancient and noble profession, and dearest hipsters – you don’t need to dress up the word bartender just to appease your parents who don’ t get it as a profession, just because they wasted so much on your psychology degree. It’s a natural transition, and just be proud of the work you do. Making it “mixology” just makes you sound insecure – and gives you faux carte blanche to mangle ancient drink recipes. Yes I didn’t want to learn iambic pentameter to better understand free form poetry, but learn the classics prior to breaking out the ginger foam and home made bitters. Bitters that you can buy for a dollar are a tried and true recipe, and just because you can try and make bitters doesn’t mean you should…. as if we want that crap “brewed” in the back by a trash can and flies. Save that crap for your ironic holiday sweater parties. Being a bartender is a good profession. Be proud, and know what you are. There were 3 original professions – the prostitute, the hotelier for the room, and the hotel bar for her to meet her John. You are part of history.


So I meant this to be more meaningful or thoughtful, but to those that “get” local, and organic, and get why it’s important, while getting it shouldn’t be marketing but just the way we do things…. enjoy Portlandia, and the “Is it Local” sketch, with a “Mixologist” sketch to boot.


And the Mixology skit:

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